My grandparents were introduced to each other at the ages of 18 and 16 by a Jewish shadchan, and they lived together adoringly for the rest of my grandfather’s life, leaving my grandmother a grieving widow for the rest of hers. For such matchmaking to work, there must be a tightly organised society in which young females are under constant watch and young males, if they sow wild oats at all, are expected to do so outside the community. What is most admired is early marriage, which removes the temptation of unsuitable partners. Indeed, in Judaism, early (teenage) marriage is a religious duty. But obviously, we are different now. By the same author: Verizon Communications. The young want education before marriage, and their Treaty want it for them.
So there are hordes of young, hormones fizzing single people whirling around, well out of the family’s eye – and no modern parents, be they upper-class aristocrats or from the ethnic minorities, have a hope in light of using the old techniques to help their eager young find mates. The result is that, while some happen to meet life partners at clubs and pubs and evening classes, too many fail in their search for that one special person who would provide the family life for which they yearn. Hence the dating agencies. But this is not on indictments of modern marriage. Marriage is as important to people modern as it what to our remote ancestors. It is what it has always been: a contract between two people to share their re-sources in order to rear their young.
to enjoy regular sex; to provide each other with companionship and, in due course, care in rickety old age (if they’re lucky). However, element of consumerism has been added to the process of getting married. These agencies and ads often cost a fortune and, although some may have success, it is unlikely that they will ever be as good at the job as the old shadchan who paired off my grandparents. She brought to the task a deep personal knowledge of the young people involved and a real affection for them and their community. I think it’s time we brought this service back into use. It is not coercive (parents who try to force their wishes on their unwilling young are at fault, not the system) and “certainly delivers happy marriage more successfully than our western system of relying on hormone-fired romantic love between two people who meet by accident.” Whether you agree with her or not it is worth thinking about. And if decide you might still like a space age match maker try Spacelocker.com.